we have officially lost it.
No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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