I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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