The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
people are starting to question the shark bite story
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
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