is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
i just made my gag reflex go away.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize