he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize