GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
