She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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