Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
