so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
How does one acquire holy water?
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
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