I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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