if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Randomize
