Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
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Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
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This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
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