We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
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