I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Randomize
