okay pat passed out under dana's car
we're chasing vodka with high fives
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
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