The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
