I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Randomize
