i wish there were pregnant emoticons
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
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