Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
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