did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
