john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
