Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
Randomize
