Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize
