He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize