I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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