how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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