Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
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