We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
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