Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
It was like giving head to a cactus.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Randomize
