i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
