I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
two words...techno handjob
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
