are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.