pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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