think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
