Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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