i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Randomize
