that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
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