found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
where does the pee come out of this thing
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
well, you know. whores of a feather.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
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