I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Randomize
