He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Operation Purity has been aborted
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
did i walk over a car last night?
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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