It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
