2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
