that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
Cancelling your gym membership calls for alcohol.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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