no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
