people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
