I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
