so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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