Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
