Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
only you would photoshop your dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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