Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
