You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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