I haven't been this sober since birth.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
